Busy Wings

I watched as a man stood near me, talking to a bee, trying to let it wash itself before he captured it to let it outside

In thise few moments, I thought about all of those times I failed to let insects be themselves, they are hust babies trying to navigate the world just as we are

We can learn so much about the world through all of the crawling and flapping of the wings, if we just paid nore attention

Writings From The Cafe

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Q-Tip Ideas

I used to clean my ears so much
and I didn’t understand why until today

I was trying to push the voice that told me that I was better off falling in my own, through to the other side

I’d wet the end of a q-tip, hoping the water would drown out my thoughts, instead it made them float

Rocking

I’m being rocked back and forth like the cradle we were all warning children about

But instead of falling out, pieces of me were already missing, clinging to the insides of a tree’s bitter fruit

I’m still yearning to be held like an abandoned kitten left at the side of the road, only my family is still here

I’m trying to see if the tides will tie me over with their frightening charm, but I’m slowly breaking my own neck looking back at my old self

Straining my ears from pushing my own voice down them to see if it’ll slither out the other side

I just want to cry without being sad and laugh without anger

Broken Glows

am I even thinking
of tomorrow
and not letting go of yesterday?

I’m dreaming of a broken sunrise
and hoping that I can heal myself with the moon
dead of the night, shining to guide me with her
tiny little hat
sitting ontop of a glowing head

I want so many things
but I keep bumping into

One Minute Poem.

Pew

I used to sit behind you
staring at you until
the pews looked like they were on fire

In reality, it was my brain that was swelling with flames
flames that you started
flames that you fueled and then walked away from

I used to wonder if you destroyed others like you stole me
stole parts of me
stole my weakest parts

I am who I am today, but not because of you
but because I stopped, dropped and rolled away from you
like the teachers taught us to do when we were engulfed in sparks

Complaint Caves

I shouldn’t complain
because I could be worse
but my worse keeps getting worse

and my best is alightly my best
and I’m struggling to part the clouds instead of laying on them

Can I just stop fighting my brain and let the sides of my skull naturally cave in?

Fully Tamperng

I stopped feeding my body the nourishments it’s been fed for so long, the seeds in my brain have been tampered with.

Oh, I see that I’m breaking, but is one really broken if they are only missing pieces?

I’ve never known this so called wholeness people are seeking and maybe when I’m diving to depths I’ve only dreamt of in my sleep, I’m really mourning the loss of caring that I wanted to be like everyone else in the first place.

I enjoy it when the universe tries to destroy me because it’s when I feel the most alive, the most like myself, the most unlike anyone else I’ve ever come across.

When the lightning strikes, It’s as though I’m being hit with a lethal dose of my own medicine and that both terrifies and excites me

Because I am everything some people fear, but I’m also more than just a beast wearing another lover’s face