Twisted Eyelids

I can feel my thoughts
catching on my gums
every time I chew on
words that keep
getting caught underneath
my tongue
and it’s uncomfortable

I can see my own eyelids
from the inside
twisting images
and squeezing the memories
out onto my skin
drip drip dripping
all over my veins

I can hear my brain
spinning on top of my
spinal cord
turning around
like a carousel
only my skull is
the seat that my sanity
is sitting on
as insanity controls the speed

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Self Concrete

For a split second
I thought you had come around
but you have already turned
into the person I already knew you were

For an entire moment
I saw the potential in you
To accept me for who I am
And just not support who I was

From Last to Now

​Everytime I bring up the fact that I’m becoming more myself

You bat it away like a player up to bat
Everytime I try to tell you that

I’m uncomfortable with you identifying me for me

You act like I’m a burden.                       even though you say I’m not

I’m happier now, but it still stings.

Deleting and making a new blog.

To my followers and anyone who comes across this.

I have had this blog for I believe 4 or 5 years now and when I first made it, I used my legal first name as my url and I want to get away from that.

I’d hate to lose my followers, but I want to make a new blog and move all of my writing over to it.

I will make another post with my new blog url when I make one.

Thank you to all of you who have stuck with me since the beginning and thank you to all of my new readers.

 

Dear Janelle

Dear Janelle,

I’m writing you this because I can’t really call you, or I could but I’d just be hearing your voice and I don’t want to make this any harder than it has been for the past few years.

We have been one in sync with each other since we were born. Attached to the hip some might say.

We were raised the same way, same values. But we started to drift farther and farther apart when we were in our early twenties, but we stayed together for the sake of our routines and our loved ones.

We knew that if we drifted too far apart, our families wouldnt accept us as much as they did when we tried to force things to work.

I’m finding a new love within myself and so I have to let most of you go, but I will never deny that you were ever on my mind, or in my heart, but the time has come for me to shed my old skin and walk in new shoes.

You will always be apart of me and I’ll hold you with me always, but like a child with their favourite blanket, they let go of it eventually but always remember it. You have been my blanket for my entire life.

I am filing a divorce from you so that I can be who I need to be on my own, but I’m sure we will still talk from time to time and your name will come up in conversations, probably often as I tell the story of us, but for now I have to let most of you go.

Never forgotten.

Braeydyn.