Fully Tamperng

I stopped feeding my body the nourishments it’s been fed for so long, the seeds in my brain have been tampered with.

Oh, I see that I’m breaking, but is one really broken if they are only missing pieces?

I’ve never known this so called wholeness people are seeking and maybe when I’m diving to depths I’ve only dreamt of in my sleep, I’m really mourning the loss of caring that I wanted to be like everyone else in the first place.

I enjoy it when the universe tries to destroy me because it’s when I feel the most alive, the most like myself, the most unlike anyone else I’ve ever come across.

When the lightning strikes, It’s as though I’m being hit with a lethal dose of my own medicine and that both terrifies and excites me

Because I am everything some people fear, but I’m also more than just a beast wearing another lover’s face

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Above, between, below.

When I was young, I’d sit in that rocking chair
And I’d zone out

Sometimes I’d just go into another world
And even when I snapped back, I just hovered

Above reality
Between comfort
Underneath Disgust

I’d make words out of the loose bolts grinding against it’s machined body
And convince myself that there wasn’t much more than that

Different Difference

So many different words
For every face
But I cant seem to find a reason
For this discomfort

So many different souls trying to
Ignite some sort of spark
Just to fuse together
When they need to soar away

So many different bodies
Intertwining with mismatched heartbeats
And racing thoughts of something else
Not knowing what to do

Spinal Comfort

There’s that feeling again
Of you touching my spine
But it feels both warm and uncomfortable

Is that you?
How did you find me here?

There’s that feeling again
Of you trying to comfort me
But it feels so strange
Like it might not even be you
But this seems to happen whenever I appear to be lost

Twice The Identity

I was becoming fine
Or atleast I thought I was
Until I let you come back

And now, I’m re-locking my doors twice
Flicking the lights on and off twice
Biting my cheeks and touching things twice

I was fine until my body desired affection again
And now I’m aching for my soul to fall out of all of my identies and form as one

Mouse Tail.

You’re too busy being the mouse
Waitong to taunt the cat
And when my tail creeps closer
To your trap
You laugh and run off

You’ll find a new hole home in another cat’s life
And you’ll tease them until they give in
And you’ll run back to the old victum
Acting like you are the victum

But darling, everyone dispises you
So quit playing your own game

Paperless Disappointment

I write about you like you put the stars in my eyes
And you know what?

I’d rather write about you than talk to you because paper won’t disappoint me like you will

And I’ll write about you until my heart fills with self love

And I’ll write about you until my pen snaps from the weight of my thoughts