Day 29 – 30 Day Transgender Challenge

Song that I am listening to while writing this post:

Hello Time Bomb by Matthew Good Band

Write out something positive about yourself using the letters of your name. Ex. Your name is Bob so B-Beautiful O-Outstanding B-Boy.

I have a few preferred names thta I go by, but I’ll use the name that I’ve been going by for a while.

Joker

Aware

Self-Expressor

Pleaser

Expressive

Revived

I had to look up some words because I had thought of more negative words than positive.

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I am me and that’s all I should be.

I did or said something that offended you and you tell me that I am not your brother but your sister and I’ll always be female, yet when we are getting along in general, you refer to me as your older brother with little or no hesitation?

I love you, you’re my little sister and I’ve only known you for over a year now. I never knew that I’d meet you and become so close to you. You’re one of my biggest supporters and allies and for that, I am greatly appreciative of.

I understand that I offend you at time, and do things to hurt you, but telling someone who doesn’t identify as the gender they were assigned with at birth that they will never be the gender that they not only identify as but actually are, is a really offensive punch to throw.

I’m not the gender I was assigned with, regardless, what does my gender identification have to do with fights that weren’t even revolved around gender or sexuality, or anything of the sort?

 

Transitioning and pronouns.

I’m all over the place with identifying as one thing, then another thing. It not only confuses others, but myself.

One minute I identify as androgynous, the next transgender the next a queer transguy. I’ve gotten rude comments thrown at me either on Tumblr anonymously or even people who used to be my friends.

It’s not that I’m throwing different tags on my posts on various social networks just because I can, I’m not even ” throwing ” them, I’m using them because my gender and sexuality changes almost on a daily and it gets annoying when people just assume that I’m using said labels just because I can and to ” put a bad name behind gender ” as I’ve been told.

If anything, all in all, regardless if I further my transition by taking testosterone or not, first and foremost, I want to legally change my name and gender and get top surgery.

I am my own person and people’s words do not define me. I’m not apologizing for being on and off, back and forth with my identity. I don’t do that to piss anyone off.

 

Day 02 – 30 Day Transgender Callenge

I accidentally forgot to post for the second day of this challenge yesterday, so I’ll be positing the third day after I finish uploading this one.

How did you choose your name, and what names were you thinking about using and why?

I don’t really remember what it was exactly that helped me come up with one of the names I have been going by for a long time, but it might have been because of Twilight because one of the characters names was Jasper, but I think I had chosen it before that.

Before I decided to go by Jasper, I had named a personality ( I wasn’t ever diagnosed with Multiple Personality Disorder, but I was told that I may be Boarder Line Personality ) Nelson because my friend called me Nell and then Nelson and the personality I had named was the side that helped me be comfortable with my sexuality and then I realized it may be more than just a sexuality issue.

I’ve been going by Jasper for over a year now but for a while, I’ve also been identifying as Braeydyn Traeyce. I just like the sound of Braeydyn.