Canvas Lashes

Song that I am listening to while writing the following poem: 

Let Me Go By KDrew, Rico & Miella

If only I could muster of the words to tell people exactly how I feel                                                                                                                                                                               As limited as my vocabulary is, my breath mutters more than any definition could scream                                                                                                                                       So the way my body moves is it’s own language undefined, unnoticed

Tear drops are the one thing I can rely on, just as pictures explain more than anything vocalized ever could                                                                                                       It’s taken me years to realize, appreciate such gestures as those subliminal images                                                                                                                                             Atleast for now, poetry radiates a bit of what can be seen if you allow your imagination to gather enough information from such things

For now, kisses are the one form of poetry I haven’t experienced enough                                                                                                                                                                 The way lips softly brush the canvas with light strokes and                                                                                                                                                                                       butterfly lashes fluttering quickly as fast as one blinks                                                                                                                                                                                           marking it’s territory by leaving trails of salty tear like substances

One day I’ll be able to find a new canvas to project such broad ideas onto                                                                                                                                                                 and jump back and look for a bird’s eye view as such an illusion may appear from afar

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Day 10 – 30 Days Transgender Challenge

I think that since I listen to music often while I’m writing/blogging, I’m going to list the song that I’m listening to as I’m writing just for fun.

Right now I’m listening to A Part Of Me ( Ft. Laura Whiteside ) by Neck Deep.

What are some of your fears in regards to being trans?

Personally, my fears may be different than other people’s fears, but a huge fear of mine is coming out to employers. 

When I was working with children, I was still identifying as female, but I was struggling with pronouns and trying to figure myself out. I was referred to as ” Ms. ” and my last name. I hadn’t asked to use my preferred name. I didn’t know how to go about it.

Then I had an interview at this place and asked if I could go by my preferred name and I never got the job, and I thought by that point I may have gotten it.

At my previous job, I had asked to be referred to as Jay and my boss asked me if that’s what I wanted and he never asked me why. It eased some of my worries.