Find me, I’m not lost.

What is it that youre attempting to achieve here?

Youre barely here
Youre not even there
But youre finding a home elsewhere
And im trying to find myself in the middle of nowhere

What are you even doing?

Youre not sure
Youre not even trying to make me feel secure
You make me feel so impure

Different Difference

So many different words
For every face
But I cant seem to find a reason
For this discomfort

So many different souls trying to
Ignite some sort of spark
Just to fuse together
When they need to soar away

So many different bodies
Intertwining with mismatched heartbeats
And racing thoughts of something else
Not knowing what to do

Spinal Comfort

There’s that feeling again
Of you touching my spine
But it feels both warm and uncomfortable

Is that you?
How did you find me here?

There’s that feeling again
Of you trying to comfort me
But it feels so strange
Like it might not even be you
But this seems to happen whenever I appear to be lost

Twice The Identity

I was becoming fine
Or atleast I thought I was
Until I let you come back

And now, I’m re-locking my doors twice
Flicking the lights on and off twice
Biting my cheeks and touching things twice

I was fine until my body desired affection again
And now I’m aching for my soul to fall out of all of my identies and form as one

Mouse Tail.

You’re too busy being the mouse
Waitong to taunt the cat
And when my tail creeps closer
To your trap
You laugh and run off

You’ll find a new hole home in another cat’s life
And you’ll tease them until they give in
And you’ll run back to the old victum
Acting like you are the victum

But darling, everyone dispises you
So quit playing your own game

Paperless Disappointment

I write about you like you put the stars in my eyes
And you know what?

I’d rather write about you than talk to you because paper won’t disappoint me like you will

And I’ll write about you until my heart fills with self love

And I’ll write about you until my pen snaps from the weight of my thoughts

Table Top Leaves

It’s funny how the legs on the table have turned in on themselves

You’re the top

And you’re pushing down on the old dented me
But while you were gone, I attempted to prop my heart up with the smell of used books

And the twigs of an old tree branch
You came back and left faster than the wind was able to whisper to the leaves that I’m okay without you

And it was as though they accidentally fell into your ego and sprouted cherry blossoms

Into your head

Instead of mine

And that’s how you knew

Road to Gravel

I asked where you were going
You drove by and answered
Little boy, I’m going crazy, wanna come?

Little did I know, I already was on the road to where he was heading
Even though he never told me exactly where the roads met to be considered losing sanity

But I could taste the rusting familiarity on my tongue
As I fell face first into the gravel
After being warned that I was doing it all wrong

Stubborn, I was, but needed to learn on my own before it was too late to be taught

And now I’m too old to be scolded twice and too young to have watched a thousand sunsets wipe across my eyes

But I felt the rose petals drop before they rose up from the ground
And I kissed them

Writings from the cafe

Planted Thoughts

They ask me why I liked abandoned places
And id always muster up some sort of reasoning

The truth is, I like to set foot in buildings that many people
Have left behind because
I have abandoned myself more than I’ve stayed in one place

And it feels so familiar, so eery
Like I do at times
And instead of letting my thoughts decay me, I throw them inside the windows and watch nature reclaim them