death ridden innocence

not sure when exactly i felt the innocence seeping from within
but i knew something was off
why did i think he was better off not speaking to me
when all i wanted to do was rip his head off and throw him to the lions

i would sit there enraged and he got away scott free, i was too young to know what being charged meant
but he deserved something close to execution
but in my head he had already died

cold like the winter’s brisk lips
i watched him fall into another life and soon iw as just another conquest
and who knows hopefully i was his only victum

sometimes it eats at me
and i want to cry and spill myself into his cup like poison and watch him die
a slow painful escape

i just want him to feel what i did, and do and have his self worth ripped from him without any word or say
i still wish hell on him

so im still stuck in my inner child, i’m not okay, my little self was never okay. just numb to the core
so numb, so broken
im abroken adult with a sad heart
searching, searching so far

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